Viggo And A Teacosy

Last night I sat down to watch Daylight. I was mainly bothering with this due to the appearance of Viggo Mortensen early on in the movie. Now I have to say, that this is probably one of the most ridiculous movies I've seen in a long time. And that's taking into account the fact that I saw Charlie's Angels 2: Full Throttle fairly recently. At least someone on that set realised it was completely daft, even if it was only Drew Barrymore's russian dialect coach. This was just... painful. And therefore funny. Painfully funny. The acting was awful, the screenplay apalling, the characters annoying, the sfx tacky and obvious, and the plotline... I'm sorry, but to use a fic term, pwp anybody? (Plot? What Plot?) At least in fic pwps we usually end up with some decent smut. This was just inexcusable. To sum it up: They're stuck in a tunnel. They attempt to get out of said tunnel. That's pretty much it. No worthwhile character development, no believable relationships. Oh, and a chocolate brown dog of some kind. And women screaming at rats. You could have handed over production to the idiots that do the Asian subtitles for Lord of the Rings and you would have got a better movie.

That was going to be a subtely introduced humourous link, but the site got sent a New Line copyright letter and is no longer there. You probably know what I'm talking about anyway, right?

In all honesty, I almost took the tape out, rewound, and went to bed once it became clear that Viggo wasn't returning. If you hadn't got the idea already, it really was that bad. Viggo was good. He was Viggo. Had some really bad lines, for example, "I was born 6 weeks premature, my own mother couldn't even keep me in." His character was probably one of the more quirky and interesting ones, however, which is probably why they decided he couldn't stick around for long. Oh no, they couldn't possibly have kept a decent character around, it might have made the movie half-way watchable.

They didn't even put him in a cowboy hat. Any director with any sense making a movie with Viggo in would either a) put him in a cowbow hat, b) have him take his clothes off, or c) do both at once. ("You can leeeeaave your hat ooonn.") But Peter Jackson is forgiven, of course, as he provided excessively slashable scenes with Legolas. There was a sorry excuse for a teacosy on his head at one point, which is probably the high-point of the movie as far as I'm concerned, although even that is surpassed by just 20 seconds of him in The Indian Runner. And no, I'm not thinking about those specific 20 seconds.

Errrr... yeah. Really, don't bother. Well, ok, if you're a Viggo fan, bother for the first 20 minutes or so, but after that just turn it off.