Predictable Stuff

I woke up this morning and simply couldn't be bothered.

I am bored. I am most emphatically bored. I am so bored that most people that spend any considerable length of time with me are already more than aware that I am bored. Even people I don't spend much time with and are, in fact, only dimly aware of my existence have been informed lately just how bored I am.

I am very very bored. I'm so bored that I'm boring myself just writing about how bored I am.

So in case there were any of you out there that weren't aware of quite how bored I am... now you know.

Kevin, would you like your brie and bacon sandwich to eat in, to take out, or shoved up your arse?

Only boring people get bored. I've been told that many times. I really couldn't give two tugs of a dead dog's... I've been reading too much Transmetropolitan. I really must try to remember that my mother sporadically reads this.

Polite version: I don't care. I'm losing patience with being bored, and all this nervous energy I have building up over the issue isn't helping.

But, when it comes to entertaining myself, I'm wary. I'm in the sort of mood in which I wish to start reading 6 different books at once; I want to draw this and write about that, redecorate my room... learn to tap-dance whilst singing in aramaic. I want to apply for new jobs, return to education, maybe train to actually be someone.

Predictable stuff.

I hold myself back because I don't want to throw myself into all these things at once (again). I don't want to end up with too many balls in the air (again), getting depressed and bewildered as everything inevitably comes crashing down (again). Eventually I'll get started. But this wouldn't be the right way; my head isn't in the right place. Burnout sucks.

But I'm still here. The world will still be here. I can wait. And in the meantime I have an incredibly fake smile.

See? Isn't this blogging thing wonderful? I started off all pissed at the world and myself, and now I've half come to terms with my boredom. Shiny. I'm going to be late for work again.